A slow motion disaster movie

The playcalling sheet will be handed over to the bingo caller

The 2009 Washington Redskins are turning into one of those disaster movies that goes on and on as though it’s in slow motion.

A couple of weeks ago they hired a consultant, a telltale sign foreshadowing imminent doom. Then at halftime yesterday we had some Titanic deck chair shuffling with the benching of starting quarterback Jason Campbell. After the game Jim Zorn, who has aged in dog years since taking the job some 20 months ago, had his play calling duties pulled from him by Vinny Cerrato.

When Vinny Cerrato is telling you that you’re incompetent to perform your duties, you know you’re in trouble.

Actually, anyone who thinks that Vinny made this decision must have just come back from having been kidnapped by aliens for years.

According to Redskins PR, Dan Snyder was “aware” of this decision. Yeah, right. Just like when I swing an ax I’m “aware” that it hits the tree.

Word is that Sherm Lewis, who was out of football for five years before returning as the “extra set of eyes”, will take over play calling duties. While doing so, he will have to hope that Mike Williams, who will be making his third start after being out of football for three years, can hold up well enough to make those play calls work.

This is an organization that is among the richest in all of sports. With all of those resources, why do they have to bring in guys that nobody else wanted? Are they going to bring in, say, Rich Gannon to play quarterback?

The fans and the media might understand of the team’s struggles if this was a young team in a rebuilding mode like most of the teams they have faced during the past five games. But this is the NFL’s oldest team. And it’s been adequately demonstrated that Snyder and Cerrato are incapable of building a solid football team.

In the next scene of the disaster movie, Jim Zorn will be burned at the stake. Or maybe we should look at it more like a comedic farce and envision Monty Python’s Black Knight getting his head lopped off after having had his arms and legs removed (with Snyder swinging the sword and being “aware” of it all along).

The Redskins will then play out the rest of the string. All that Redskins fans will have to hope for is a surprise ending—Cerrato walking the plank.